Thats.Just.Life.
Tuesday, December 29, 2009 @ 10:50 PM
Momentum
Momentum

Realized that I've been blogging more in the past few weeks than the rest of the year combined, so why not carry on that momentum? Its been a great holiday, lots of training, food, projects even, and a fantastic Family Camp in Desaru. Its a pity the Taiwan trip didn't materialize, or that its been such a gloomy and rainy period of time, or that I've been too busy to windsurf as much as I wished. Nonetheless, its been one of my happiest holiday periods to date. I would love to wrap up my year in this post, but there are just too many things.

Once again, more friends have returned, and some have left. Soon I'll be joining that crowd and leaving for my own adventure out there in Europe, living a truly independent life, needing to adapt, and to plan my time and finances all the more strictly. I wonder how I'll stand up to the challenge. But I know that it would be a great learning experience. I doubt that anything can replace this chapter that is to come. So many pages, and the protagonist has near zero idea how the script is going to play out. That would take the fun out of it wouldn't it?

I know I'll leave with mixed feelings. To leave so many loved ones back in Singapore would definitely leave me with a tinge of sadness and longing. But yet the compelling glitter over the horizon leads me to understand that I must go and have my adventure, and return to tell the tale, even more cherishing the ties that remain strong despite the separation of time and space.

December taught me about friendship and of patience. And as 2010 comes and new beginnings dawn, I must again make my resolutions and keep them. I felt that I had kept resolutions last year (with the help of backtracking to that post and re-assessing them). That was a nice surprise, for I had kept them without really having to remind myself. Of course, I wouldn't say I achieved them perfectly, but I believe that I had done an adequate job.

I only have one resolution this coming year.

To be more empathetic. To be more aware of the needs and feelings of others, without which I cannot minister. That would serve to better complete myself as a person and a good servant. Something that I have admittedly been lacking severely. I can't just call myself "kayu" all the time and accept it as an inherent weakness that I cannot change right?

I think its a real challenge to keep this one. But i'll do my very best. In itself, that's an irony! Empathy cannot be forced. Which just made it all the more harder.

Saturday, December 26, 2009 @ 12:41 PM
New Skin
New Skin

Whew.. after looking for a new skin for my blog, here you go! At least the images are around! Of course, this doesn't mean I'll be blogging super often, just that I come in enough times so that the missing images became a irritating problem.

New Year is coming!

@ 11:32 AM
Visitation
Visitation

I did something that I would never have thought of doing before: checking out a City Harvest worship service. It was their Christmas service, held on Christmas Eve. Of course, the curiosity of how such a service would be like coupled with a desire to accompany someone in need finally pushed me into making that decision. Looking back, I guess it was a good experience for me personally, a learning experience that strengthened my faith and commitment to what is true worship to God.

In all fairness, the production that was put up for us: a play that depicted the story of how Christ came into the world (a little blown up and also a little offensive to me at one point cos Joseph and his buddies - more of his buddies, were drinking like mad and getting drunk). But it was indeed close to esplanade-level, testimony of the huge resources, money and humans alike, that CHC possesses. And it was indeed entertaining and touching. Many times I did quiver from the emotions that were in that play. But after all is said and done, it was just that - entertaining.

I can't say for sure whether a play on its own was doctrinal. But I do know that there is only one way of converting people to Christ, and that is through preaching:

"for after that in the wisdom of God the world by wisdom knew not God, it pleased God by the foolishness of preaching to save them that believe - 1 Cor 1:21".

In comparison to what CHC practices, my congregation is a far cry from the compelling power of bringing people to come forward. But it isn't about the speaker, nor the special effects, the music, the emotions that is the point. It is the simple, unadulterated Word of God that has the power to convict people:

"for the Word of God is quick, and powerful, and sharper than any two-edged sword, piercing even unto the dividing asunder of soul and spirit, and of the joints and marrow, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart - Heb 4:12".

People have asked me if I have ever thought of leaving the Church, or the congregation that I worship in. The Church? No. The Congregation? Perhaps. But I know that there will only be one factor that matters in this decision, which is God. Granted, where I worship is nowhere near perfect. Many times I have been exasperated about the attitudes, the enthusiasm, the zeal, the ability and commitment of many members. But they are just as I am, human, imperfect, sinners. Are they serving me? No! But they are serving God, as I do, and the master pays the wages. The diligent workers will be rewarded, just like the parable of the talents (Mt 25:14-30). My responsibility is to use my talents to the best I can, and do my best to encourage those around me to do the same. Therefore, despite all the disappointments I feel at times, only if the congregation falls into sin would I ever think of leaving Jurong.

But there are positive things to learn from CHC. I was truly impressed by the warmth and the zeal that many people had. The commitment to use their strengths, their abilities, and to truly put them into "service" to the Lord. Whether doctrinal or not, that very attitude is one that is truly commendable. It showed me what a congregation is able to achieve. The basement auditorium of CHC is perhaps 4 or 5 times larger than ours. If Jurong is able to organize herself such that it can do what CHC is able to do, I believe that we can be many many times a better worker for the Lord.

Some endnotes:

Christmas is not Christ's birthday. It never was, and never will. I'm sorry if I do not give out gifts or wish you merry christmas freely, because of that simple reason. But rest assured that the love and care that I feel for everyone is always the same. Christ only asked us to commorate His death, which was what brought salvation to this world, not His birth.

Sins can only be washed away during baptism, and the prayer of forgiveness (with repentance) by Christians (Mk 16:16). You do not build a relationship with God through the sinner's prayer, nor the prayer of someone else. It is though the Plan of Salvation.

Yes, Christianity may be not what people expect. It is difficult, and at times come between you and your desires. But the ultimate desire is to go to heaven and escape the fire of hell. Even in economic wisdom, that holds true.

profile
Reach my prismic soul.
Benjamin Chen
Born 24 Jun 1986
Reborn 24 Aug 2003
Perpetually in a zombified state. Liverpool fan.
Keming Pri > BPGHS > PJC > SMU
WSO(ADA)
Cancer

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Unconditional Desires.
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Massimo Dutti Coat
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To demolish his room
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